Thanksliving: Practicing an Attitude of Perpetual Gratitude

   

It's been said that life is a good news, bad news proposition. The good news is that life's challenges help us grow. The bad news is that there is more good news coming! 😅

In his book Discovering the Laws of Life, the famed money manager and philanthropist John Templeton coined the word “Thanksliving.” He recommended practicing an attitude of perpetual gratitude.

That's not hard when times are good. But in these times, fraught with uncertainty, an attitude of continual thankfulness can be a tall order. Yet Templeton offers a radical solution. Don't just give thanks for your blessings. Be grateful for your problems, too.

This seems wildly counterintuitive at first blush (Almost crazy😲). But facing our challenges makes us stronger, smarter, tougher, and more valuable as leaders, employees, parents, mates, ...and human beings.

"Solving problems is what were made for" it's what makes life worth living," remarked Templeton.

He goes on, "Adversity, when overcome strengthens us. So we are giving thanks not for the problem itself but for the strength and knowledge that comes from it. Giving thanks for the growth ahead of time will help you grow through--not just go through--your challenges."

What ever problems we're grappling with--personal, social, health, or financial--the best course is to face them with all the courage, patience, and equanimity you can muster.

And if possible be grateful.

On occasion, of course, our problems are simply bigger than we are. In an address in 1859, Abraham Lincoln recounted the following tale:

It is said that an Eastern Monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and in all situations. They presented him with the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction!

That's something worth keeping in mind.

Whatever your problems, few of them can withstand the onslaught of optimism, persistence, and a genuine spirit of gratitude.

As the poet Robert Frost reminds us, "The best way out is always through."

Check out a must-read related post: Why It's Healthy And Productive to Cultivate A Culture of Gratitude at Work  (5 min read)

Happy Thanksgiving!

Peter Mclees, Leadership Coach, Trainer and Performance Consultant
SMART DEVELOPMENT

 

Take the Next Step...
Interested in learning how to develop your organization's leadership capability, culture, and employee engagement? We begin with a collaborative discovery process identifying your unique needs and business issues. To request an interview with Peter Mclees please 

contact: Email: petercmclees@gmail.com  or  Mobile:323-854-1713

Smart Development has an exceptional track record helping service providers, ports, sales teams, restaurants, stores, distribution centers, food production facilities, wealth management services, third-party maintenance providers, real estate services, nonprofits, government agencies and other businesses create a strong culture, leadership bench strength, coaching skills and the teamwork necessary for growth.

Having worked with several companies throughout their growth cycle, we have valuable insights and strategies that would help any late stage startup, small or medium sized company achieve sustained growth and prosperity.

 

 

Thanksliving: Practicing an Attitude of Perpetual Gratitude

   

It's been said that life is a good news, bad news proposition. The good news is that life's challenges help us grow. The bad news is that there is more good news coming!

In his book Discovering the Laws of Life, the famed money manager and philanthropist John Templeton coined the word “Thanksliving.” He recommended practicing an attitude of perpetual gratitude.

That's not hard when times are good. But in these times, fraught with uncertainty, an attitude of continual thankfulness can be a tall order. Yet Templeton offers a radical solution. Don't just give thanks for your blessings. Be grateful for your problems, too.

This seems wildly counterintuitive at first blush. But facing our challenges makes us stronger, smarter, tougher, and more valuable as leaders, employees, parents, mates, ...and human beings.

"Solving problems is what were made for" it's what makes life worth living," remarked Templeton.

He goes on, "Adversity, when overcome strengthens us. So we are giving thanks not for the problem itself but for the strength and knowledge that comes from it. Giving thanks for the growth ahead of time will help you grow through--not just go through--your challenges."

What ever problems we're grappling with--personal, social, health, or financial--the best course is to face them with all the courage, patience, and equanimity you can muster.

And if possible be grateful.

On occasion, of course, our problems are simply bigger than we are. In an address in 1859, Abraham Lincoln recounted the following tale:

It is said that an Eastern Monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and in all situations. They presented him with the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction!

That's something worth keeping in mind.

Whatever your problems, few of them can withstand the onslaught of optimism, persistence, and a genuine spirit of gratitude.

As the poet Robert Frost reminds us, "The best way out is always through."

Check out a related post: Why It's Healthy and Productive to Cultivate A Culture of Gratitude

Peter Karl

Develop 5 Essential Skills to Lead Effectively in Today’s 'VUCA' World

 

 

 

 

The way we work has changed, and so has leadership. As a manager, you need to evolve, too. In today’s VUCA (Volatile. Uncertain. Complex. Ambiguous.) business climate, developing these five essential skills will help you lead your team more effectively. Mastering these skills takes practice and intentional effort.

1. Social intelligence.

A key component of emotional intelligence is social intelligence. Social intelligence is the ability to understand and tune into the emotional temperature of others. It's about reading the room, gauging the collective mood, and recognizing the emotional landscape of your team. Is everyone on the same page, or is there unspoken tension? Is there cohesion, or are there gaps in understanding? Are all voices being heard, or are some perspectives missing?

This is the ability to read your team’s emotional tone. Pay attention to unspoken cues—such as tensions, moods, and dynamics—and use that insight to guide your actions.

How to tune into the emotional dynamics of your team

Ø  Conduct regular temperature checks with your team. At your next group meeting, try this exercise: Ask everyone to write down (anonymously or not) three things they love about their work that motivate them, and three things that are frustrating. After collecting the responses, take some time to review and synthesize the feedback. Then, share the common themes with the group. Talk about the positives and the pain points. Be open and honest; transparency helps build morale and trust within the team. You might not be able to solve every problem, but this is a magical way to make your team feel that their leader cares.  People want to feel heard.

Ø  Practice sharpening your emotional radar outside of work. Try observing conversations in public spaces like cafés. Pay attention to emotional undertones, reactions, and how people connect (or don’t). Notice the nuances in their relationships and look for non-verbal cues like facial expressions, body language, and even silence. Think of it as people-watching with purpose. Have fun with it.

2. Adaptive communication.

Adjust your communication style based on the situation and audience. Listen more, speak less, and build genuine connections by understanding how your employees prefer to be treated. This skill involves knowing how and when to adjust your behavior and leadership style to fit the situation. Successful leaders adapt their approach to meet the moment and boost overall team performance. Leaders need to know how to move hearts and minds. That means not just understanding how others feel, but using that knowledge to influence, motivate, and guide.

The golden rule — treat people as you would like to be treated — is outdated. It’s now the platinum rule: treat people as they want to be treated.

How to adapt your leadership style to others

Ø  Make a concerted effort at relationship building. Whether you’re part of a team or leading one, carve out time for one-on-one conversations to understand what your colleagues care about, their priorities, and how they see the world. Empathize. Make a genuine effort to understand your employees and co-workers perspectives and feelings. Ask more and tell less and really listen

Ø  Use tools like the DISC assessment and the Predictive Index to gain deeper insights into people’s personalities. These provide a new lens to see each other. Some people are down-to-business and task-oriented, while others are more people-oriented.”

    Leaders often instinctively try to change someone’s feelings — by cheering them up or calming them down. Sometimes, simply acknowledging their emotions is enough. Letting someone know you understand their feelings without trying to change them helps in building trust.

Ø  Engage in Mindful Reflection. Before a meeting or important conversation, set clear goals for what you want to achieve and how you want to be perceived. Afterward, review how well you met those goals and consider any tweaks for next time. This practice helps develop self-awareness and adaptability.

3. Flexible thinking.

When things feel unpredictable and uncertain, there’s a natural tendency to become rigid in your thinking, which limits your ability to weigh different solutions to problems. But to be an effective leader in challenging times, you must be able to juggle competing priorities and hold opposing ideas in your head.

This means embracing ambiguity seeking out new perspectives, and understanding the larger context. When leaders signal they’re open to new opinions, research shows that team members feel safer sharing their ideas, ultimately leading to more thoughtful decisions and stronger outcomes. Thriving amid uncertainty means leaning into it, not shying away.

How to boost Your mental agility

Ø Seek out different perspectives. Consider the different viewpoints on your team. Actively listening to others, especially those with diverse experiences and perspectives, leads to more creative and thoughtful solutions. Leaders in the past felt pressure to have all the answers, but the pace of technological change calls for a different approach. Asking good questions allows you to move beyond your hardened perspective and embrace very different possibilities and ways of thinking.

Ø Experiment with tools like mind mapping. Mind mapping is a technique for diagramming ideas and organizing information in a structure similar to a flowchart, showing relationships between them. You can take meeting notes in mind-map form; you can also experiment with it during group discussions and brainstorming sessions. It taps into your creative side and it helps you visually explore ideas and uncover connections that might not be immediately obvious.

 

 4. Strategic disruption.

This is a skill that involves challenging the status quo. Rather than sticking to established conventions, leaders must identify and question outdated practices to explore new ideas that could improve outcomes. It’s not about breaking rules just for the sake of it, but rather questioning long-standing practices and pushing for continuous learning and improvement.

How to get more comfortable challenging the status quo

Ø Tap into the ideas and perspectives of others to open up new possibilities. Remember: People on the front lines and in different departments see things that you might overlook. Reserve the last 10 minutes of weekly meetings to ask everyone: What could we be doing better? This practice encourages team members to come prepared with suggestions. Even if you’re not officially running meetings, you can still contribute to a culture of innovation by offering ideas for improvement.

Ø Expand your network. Both in and outside your company with people whose worldviews are different from yours. Seek feedback from them and others who can help you uncover your biases and challenge you.

5. Resilient self-awareness.

As a leader, you’re expected to be always on call and constantly available to support your employees, whether with work issues or their mental health needs You’re expected to be dissociated from your humanity, but leaders are only human.

Self-awareness involves recognizing your own limitation and understanding when to seek support. This important leadership skill is not only about managing your own stress but also about setting a healthy example for your team. By being aware of your needs and boundaries, you demonstrate strength and self-care, which contributes to a positive work environment.

How to foster emotional strength and mental endurance

Ø Develop a strong support system. Seek resources both inside and outside of work, such as mentors, counselors, and peer groups. Having people who can offer constructive advice is invaluable — especially if they can help with real-time adjustments.

Ø Try this simple yet powerful practice. Regularly ask 4 to 6 people who know you best at work — your boss, peers, and direct reports — for feedback. Ask them: What am I doing well? And what I could improve? Give them a week to reflect, then follow up for their ideas.

Choose a couple of areas on which to focus, and then follow up with specific questions like: Five months ago, you told me to work on becoming a better listener. I’ve tried not to interrupt and to stay off my phone. How am I doing?

Repeat this process two to three times a year. You might fear that admitting weaknesses will make you seem less competent. But really, you’re modeling how to receive feedback. It makes you seem stronger and more human.

Ø Study your favorite athletes. Draw inspiration from how they manage their physical and mental states to perform at their best. Performing at peak is not sustainable. You need to know when to taper, how to recover, and how to build up endurance.

Developing these five key leadership skills isn’t just about your personal growth, it’s about shaping the future of work and inspiring those around you. Leaders are under new pressures to perform at higher levels and adapt quickly to changing demands. But while leadership today is harder, it is also more exciting. There is more opportunity to drive real change and to make a lasting positive impact.

To your greater success and well-being,

Peter Mclees, Leadership Coach, Trainer and Performance Consultant
SMART DEVELOPMENT

 

Take the Next Step...

Interested in learning how to develop your organization's leadership capability, culture, and employee engagement? We begin with a collaborative discovery process identifying your unique needs and business issues. To request an interview with Peter Mclees please 

contact: Email: petercmclees@gmail.com  or  Mobile: 323-854-1713

Smart Development has an exceptional track record helping energy and facilities management, ports, sales teams, restaurants, stores, distribution centers, food production facilities, wealth management services, real estate services, nonprofits, government agencies and other businesses create a strong culture, leadership bench strength, coaching skills and the teamwork necessary for growth.

Having worked with several companies throughout their growth cycle, we have valuable insights and strategies that would help any late stage startup, small or medium sized company achieve sustained growth and prosperity.

 

 

Pro Tips for Conducting Great One-on-One Meetings

 

 

 

 

 

 

If one-on-ones are so valuable for leaders and team members alike, why does everyone seem to dread them?

Despite their potential, these meetings often feel like a box to check off rather than a real opportunity for connection.

If you find yourself dreading one-on-ones or leaving each meeting feeling deflated, you’re not alone.

The problem isn’t the concept of one-on-ones but how we approach them.

Effective meetings require more than showing up – they need meaningful design and facilitation.

One-on-ones have a bad reputation. Many view them as awkward or unproductive –just another meeting on an already packed agenda. Yet, they are critical to your team’s success.

When done right, one-on-one meetings can be game-changers for both leaders and team members. They provide a unique opportunity for genuine conversations. While email, Slack, or Zoom keep everyone in the loop, nothing replaces the value of direct, personal interactions.

However, great one-on-ones require more than just a quick touch base. They provide a chance to tackle bigger issues beyond regular updates.

Whether you’re looking to build trust, address roadblocks, or improve relationships, here’s how to transform your one-on-ones from a mundane task into a highlight of the workweek.

Key Benefits of One-on-One Meetings

Regular one-on-ones create a space for real connection and problem solving. They offer an opportunity to surface issues, promote dialogue between managers and employees, and focus on the big picture, providing perspective beyond day-to-day tasks.

A Gallup study revealed that employees who have regular one-on-one meetings with their managers are three times as likely to be engaged in their work. Here are some of the key benefits:

Get personal time

In a group setting, conversations can easily veer off track or get monopolized by a few voices. One-on-ones create a dedicated time to check in on specific progress, challenges, and needs – efficiently and directly. It’s a great way to identify bad habits before they become harmful.

Build trust

One-on-one meetings play a powerful role in improving personal relationships. Giving someone your full attention, even for 30 minutes, shows that you value them. This intimate environment provides a safe space to discuss career growth, performance challenges, or personal issues without the pressure of an audience.

Address roadblocks

One of the key responsibilities of a manager is to remove unnecessary roadblocks so people can focus on doing their work instead of fighting bureaucracy. Casual, frequent check-ins allow employees to raise things that are getting in their way rather than struggle alone in silence.

Encourage problem solving

When leaders encourage team members to voice challenges openly, they cultivate a culture where problems are surfaced early and tackled together. This approach helps address the root cause and not just the symptoms.

By inviting people to brainstorm solutions, managers become helpful partners rather than mere supervisors.

Keep remote workers connected

For remote or hybrid teams, regular check-ins are even more essential to increase a sense of belonging. Frequent one-on-ones help counter feelings of isolation, keeping team members engaged and aligned no matter where they’re working from.

Provide regular feedback

One-on-ones are perfect for giving timely, actionable feedback, allowing managers to address events soon after they happen. Because they are private and timely, providing constructive feedback feels less intimidating. In a safe environment, employees speak up more and can make adjustments immediately rather than waiting for their annual performance review.

In short, one-on-ones aren’t just about tracking status; they’re about creating a foundation for trust, growth, and effective collaboration.

Design Effective One-on-One Meetings

Effective one-on-ones go beyond simply scheduling time on the calendar – they require intentional design. To make these meetings truly valuable, focus on the following key elements:

1. Establish ground rules

Whether you’re starting with one-on-ones or refining your approach, clarify your expectations and ground rules.

Explain the purpose of one-on-ones and how they will work, then address any questions from the team. Most importantly, emphasize that these are coaching sessions rather than reporting ones. The goal is not to control progress or micromanage people but to remove obstacles and support individual growth.

2. Reduce meeting anxiety

49% of team members feel anxious before one-on-one meetings with their manager – largely because they don’t know what to expect. To alleviate this, set clear expectations. Emphasize that it’s the employee’s time and meeting. Their needs, not hidden agendas, should drive the conversation. Additionally, defining the key theme or topic beforehand can significantly reduce anxiety.

3. Set a consistent cadence

Research shows that employees who have regular one-on-ones feel less anxious and more successful in their roles. Ideally, meet with each of your direct reports once a week for 30 minutes. The second-best scenario is to meet every other week.

A regular cadence sets a rhythm that both you and your team members can count on.

4. Be flexible

Having an agenda is essential. However, tailor each meeting’s purpose instead of sticking to a rigid outline. One-on-ones aren’t one-size-fits-all, and each team member has unique needs and challenges that vary from week to week.

Some people may want to focus on career development, while others might need support solving specific challenges. Start each conversation by asking, “What’s the main topic you’d like to address today?”

5. Focus on outcomes

Avoid approaching the meeting with a rigid agenda or focusing solely on tasks. Questions like “Are you making progress with project Y?” might come across like a status report rather than a meaningful conversation.

Instead, discuss desired results and goals related to the project. One-on-ones should center on “How can we achieve the desired outcomes?” rather than simply reviewing milestones. This approach encourages a more strategic and impact-oriented conversation.

Facilitate Meaningful One-on-One Conversations

The true value of one-on-ones lies in their execution. Consider the following tips to facilitate conversations that are meaningful and impactful:

Be fully present

This sounds simple, but it’s incredibly powerful. Close your laptop, silence your notifications, and give your team member your undivided attention. This signals that you’re actively listening, not just checking off another task.

Being fully present also lets you pick up on subtle cues and gain a deeper understanding.

Listen, listen, listen

Research indicates that a key indicator of a successful one-on-one is the proportion of time the employee spends talking. Strive for them to speak for at least 50% of the time spent talking.

Ask open-ended questions, let them elaborate, and resist the urge to jump in too quickly with solutions. This approach ensures they feel heard and encourages more open discussions.

Cover critical topics

To maximize the value of your one-on-ones, focus on six key areas: Personal Check-In, Goals and Aspirations, Alignment, Progress, Collaboration, and Next Steps. This framework helps both you and your team members prepare for meaningful conversations and concentrate on what’s most relevant at the time.

Consider this a flexible guide, not a rigid checklist. While Personal Check-In and Next Steps should bookend every one-on-one, other sections – like Goals and Aspirations or Progress – can be addressed as needed.

Use meaningful questions

Thoughtful, open-ended questions can turn a one-on-one from a routine check-in into a deeper conversation. Questions like, “What’s one area where you’d like to see more momentum?” or “If you could change one thing about your role, what would it be?” spark more meaningful conversations.

Rather than asking about updates or milestones, provoke reflection. Encourage your team member to think critically about their experiences, goals, and challenges.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Follow up

A one-on-one doesn’t end when you leave the room (or virtual call) – it’s just another step. Capture action items and follow-up agreements. Be sure to check in with team members before you next touch base.

Following through on what you discussed reinforces the value of one-on-ones and increases accountability. It shows that these conversations truly matter and have a real impact.

Intentional design and facilitation can transform one-on-ones into powerful conversations, making team members feel supported. Far from being just another routine meeting, they provide valuable opportunities to connect, align, and grow together.

By asking thoughtful questions, adapting to each team member’s unique needs, and using time wisely, one-on-ones become essential for building trust and accelerating collaboration.

Done well, they can evolve from a mandatory meeting into a highlight of the workweek.

To your greater success and well-being,

 

Peter Mclees, Leadership Coach, Trainer and Performance Consultant
SMART DEVELOPMENT

Take the Next Step...
Interested in learning how to develop your organization's leadership capability, culture, and employee engagement ? We begin with a collaborative discovery process identifying your unique needs and business issues. To request an interview with Peter Mclees please contact: Email: petercmclees@gmail.com  or  Mobile:323-854-1713

Smart Development has an exceptional track record helping energy and facilities management, service providers, ports, sales teams, restaurants, stores, distribution centers, food production facilities, wealth management services, real estate services, nonprofits, government agencies and other businesses create a strong culture, leadership bench strength, coaching skills and the teamwork necessary for growth.

Having worked with several companies throughout their growth cycle, we have valuable insights and strategies that would help any late stage startup, small or medium sized company achieve sustained growth and prosperity.