A Short Course in Human Relations

The six most important words:	"I admit I made a mistake."
The five most important words:	"You did a good job."
The four most important words:	"What is your opinion?"
The three most important words:	"If you please."
The two most important words:	"Thank you."
The one most important word:	"We"
The least important word:	"I"

Good feedback avoids these pitfalls

Good feedback is an essential management tool. Unfortunately, some feedback does more harm than good, leaving employees resentful, defensive, and unmotivated. When you need to give feedback to correct an employee’s mistake or performance problem, steer away from these common errors:

• Sugarcoating your feedback. Respect the employee’s feelings, but don’t hide your real concerns behind vague language that doesn’t tell employees what they need to do. “You do great work when you’re here,” doesn’t communicate the same message as, “Your absenteeism is becoming a problem.”

• Starting out too strong. Some managers take a harsh approach at the outset to preempt possible arguments. Take a tone that’s businesslike and firm, not angry or confrontational, so you don’t alienate the employee right away. You want employees to listen and respond to your concerns so you can work together.

• Focusing on the problem instead of the solution. Yes, you need to describe the problem so employees understand what you’re talking about and why it’s important. But move on quickly and emphasize that your goal is to find a solution, not a scapegoat.

• Forcing an improvement plan. Your employee needs to understand the nature of the problem before he or she will accept the need to change. Just telling him or her what to do differently won’t win real commitment. Work together as much as possible to develop an action plan you can both live with.

• Mistaking explanations for excuses. Don’t jump to conclusions when employees explain the situation. There may be a valid reason for a missed deadline or mistake—an overload of work, for example, or faulty equipment that you’re unaware of. Employees should be responsible enough to deal with problems, of course, but don’t dismiss their explanations out of hand—they may point to structural problems that only a manager can resolve.

• Forgetting to follow up. Most people don't integrate feedback without some follow up from the feedback giver.

Life and Leadership Lessons from Master Yoda

 

 

Yoda was a master mentor. He had a lot of wisdom to impart to young Luke Skywalker and the other Jedi warriors. I believe there are things we can learn about personal development and leadership from Yoda’s teachings (here in our own galaxy).

Three of my favorite pearls of truth from the green little awesome guy are:

 

 

 “Named must your fear be before banish it you can.”

“Do or do not…there is no try.”

“You will find only what you bring in.”

1.  Overcome your fears. 

“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”

“Named must your fear be before banish it you can.”

Overcoming our fears is one of the most important things to improve ourselves and grow. If we don’t we will just get stuck. But how do you do it? Well, first, as Yoda says, you have to stop avoiding your fear. You have to think about it and see what you really fear.

After you have brought some clarity to the situation, here are few tips for actually overcoming that fear.

Face your fear.

Maybe this is not what you want to hear, but in my experience and from what I’ve learned from others this is the best way to overcome your fear. And if you have handled a big fear, whatever it may be, and later realize you actually survived it, many things in life you may have feared previously seem to shrink. Those fears become smaller. They might even disappear. You may think to yourself that what you thought was a fear before wasn’t that much to be afraid at all.

Everything is relative. And every triumph, problem, fear and experience becomes bigger or smaller depending on what you compare it to.

Be curious.

A curious frame of mind makes it easier for us to face our fears. When we are stuck in fear we are closed up. We tend to create division on our world and mind. We create barriers between us and other things/people.

When you shift to being curious your perceptions and the world just opens up. Curiosity is filled with anticipation and enthusiasm. It opens you up. And when you are open and enthusiastic then you have more fun things to think about than focusing on your fear.

How do you become more curious (are you curious now? Then you already know how)? One way is to remember how life has become more fun in the past thanks to your curiosity and to remember all the cool things it helped you to discover and experience.

All is one.

Our ego wants to divide our world. It wants to create barriers, separation and loves to play the comparison game. The game when people are different compared to us, the game where we are better or worse than someone else. All this creates fear whether you call it unease, anxiety, worry or concern.

Doing the opposite removes fear. Namely, that there is not real separation between beings, that we are one and the same. This might sound bit corny or new agey but it’s been demonstrated by quantum physics that we all come from the same source.

2.  Don’t Try Do. 

“Do or do not…there is no try.”

When we tell ourselves and/or someone else we will try we are more likely to give up or just stop when the first obstacle shows up.

When you say that you will do something there is more determination and power behind the decision. When the inevitable obstacles that always show up start to block your path you are determined. You will do this. So you find ways over, under, around and through the obstacles. And that’s what you have to do most of the time to actually get things done. Smooth sailing with no problems at all is pretty rare.

By actually making clear choices to do or not to do something—and putting power behind those choices—you are likely to preserve until you succeed.

3.  Your world is a reflection of you.

“You will find only what you bring in.”

That’s what Luke is told in “The Empire Strikes Back” (The best of the original series in my opinion) before he goes into the cave on Yoda’s home planet. Inside the cave Luke battles his demons—more specifically an illusion of Darth Vader—and is confronted with his own inner darkness. The darkness he brought into the cave that could pull him over to the dark side if he allowed it to.

I think this is relevant in our world too. We find in our world what we bring into our world. And in your world you can see yourself—your thoughts and behaviors—reflected. By observing the world around you, you gain insights into yourself and what you may need to change.

Because even though there is a big, big world out there with many possibilities and people—in the end change in your life comes down to changing yourself.

It’s very easy to get stuck in thinking that your perspective, the lens though which you view reality is reality itself. But you can’t really see reality. You can only see if filtered through a lens. And the lens is you.

Changing, for example, a negative attitude to a positive one changes how you view yourself and your entire world. But it’s very hard to convince people of this truth. You just have to choose to try another perspective or frame and use it for a month or so. Your old thought patterns may want to draw you back to the comfortable stability of your old view point.

One of our greatest gifts in life is the power to choose. We can choose to see things differently. And when we do all kinds of great things show up to help us move forward.

May the force be with you.

Peter Mclees, Leadership Coach, Trainer and Performance Consultant
SMART DEVELOPMENT

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Interested in learning how to develop your organization's leadership capability, culture, and employee engagement ? We begin with a collaborative discovery process identifying your unique needs and business issues. To request an interview with Peter Mclees please 

contact: Email: petercmclees@gmail.com  or  Mobile:323-854-1713

Smart Development has an exceptional track record helping service providers, ports, sales teams, restaurants, stores, distribution centers, food production facilities, wealth management services, real estate services, nonprofits, government agencies and other businesses create a strong culture, leadership bench strength, coaching skills and the teamwork necessary for growth.

Having worked with several companies throughout their growth cycle, we have valuable insights and strategies that would help any late stage startup, small or medium sized company achieve sustained growth and prosperity.

You can't fake engagement

Quick Tips

“Engagement” may just be a fresh word for a familiar idea: Employees are more productive when they're happy and committed to your goals than when they're miserable and just trying to get by. But whatever you call it, you can't ignore the challenge. Here’s how to drive engagement in your team:

• Set clear expectations. Tell employees where your team is headed—its mission—and how you plan to get there. A clear sense of direction helps people see the connection between their daily work and their employer’s long-term success.

• Pay attention to your culture. Engagement can’t thrive in an environment that ignores employees. Listen to your workforce; ask employees what resources and training they need to do their best work; and support them in developing their skills so they feel that you’re all on the same side. Provide simple, clear and regular feedback.

• Inspire your workforce. Employees want to know that their work is about more than making money for the executives or shareholders. Tell them why their work is important and how it helps customers, the community, and the world. Just be sure to back up your inspirational talks with decisions and actions that demonstrate you’re not just mouthing slogans.

• Be authentic. Your employees won’t feel passionate about their work if they think you’re faking it. Express your own feelings about why the work is important. Celebrate successes, and be honest about setbacks. Sincerity is the foundation of engagement.

All the success!

Peter Mclees, MS LMFT
Principal

Smart Development, inc

From the Leader's Digest Mail Bag: Managing Mediocrity:

Dear Leader’s Digest:

I am struggling with some employees who are just not cutting it. Their performance is mediocre at best, but there is not enough cause to terminate them. Other employees have complained about them. Customers have not complained about them but they never receive compliments either.

I feel as though I am stuck with these people who are not up to par. How can I better handle employees who just skate by doing the minimum?

Dear Managing Mediocrity:

We hope you're sitting down because our answer is going to suggest more work than you might have hoped. But we can assure you that if you really want to raise performance for not only these low performers, but for the entire employee, this is an approach that may help.

First, let’s agree on the real problem. The issue you're facing is not low performers. The issue is low expectations. If these two employees are truly low performers and yet “there is not enough cause to terminate them,” then you are operating in a culture with mediocre norms. And if that’s true, then the work you have to do is not first and foremost with the low performers, it is with chronically bad group norms. If your team was crystal clear on high performance expectations, mediocrity would be painfully apparent and you wouldn't have to make a tough call when it came time to coach, counsel or redeploy.

So, how do you reset norms? How can you set a high performance standard that makes dealing with mediocrity much clearer?

1. Confirm the Company/Region/HR Standard. You, your peers, your supervisors, and HR need to have a uniform and explicit understanding about the kind of performance you expect from employees, their position and the duties they are performing in your store.

2. Go Public. Once you have sufficient support from the people identified in step 1 for the hard decisions involved with a higher performance standard, you'll have to go public. Let people know the bar is being raised. Let them know of any implications for jobs, for development, and any other consequences people will need to understand so there are no surprises. Acknowledge that the norms-expectations were different in the past, without sounding self-righteous and judgmental of past leadership. Frankly state how things will be going forward and why this is right for the store and good for those involved. Sell the vision as a way of instilling pride and ambition. Let people know that there will be ample and just opportunities to upgrade their contribution, as well as how you'll support that with candor, coaching, and development.


3. Coach, Coach, Coach—Redeploy. Now live the standard. If someone performs below the standard, coach them—have the “content” conversation to let them know the gap between what they did and what you expected. Three factors set those who are adept at talking about mediocre behavior apart from the rest of the pack: research, homework and connection. First, you need to gather data. Have a talk with the marginal employees about what they like and don't like about their current work situation. What are their frustrations, aspirations, and concerns? Approach your “research” conversation with a genuine desire to discover underlying barriers and then see if you can find ways to resolve them.

Next, scrupulously gather facts—from memory and observation—that will allow you to describe in illuminating detail the difference between mediocrity and excellence. This is crucial. Many managers are so vague about the difference that they end up using the feel-good, mean-nothing terms that typically pepper pregame speeches, such as “We need you give 110 percent.” This advise may make sense to those giving it but it only confuses and insults the people who are supposed to change. Ask yourself, what actual behaviors can I describe to make this distinction clear?

Finally, connect your homework with your research. Explain how your recommendations will not only bridge the performance gap but help them achieve their aspirations. When you make this link your influence will increase enormously. Also, this would be a great time to use goal setting to engage the employee in identifying and resolving the performance shortfall.

If it continues, coach again—but this time have a “pattern” conversation—let them know this is now a chronic concern, not an isolated concern. If needed, this escalation is documented and any necessary support in the form of training, mentoring, work process change, etc., is offered. If it happens again, it’s time for a “relationship” conversation. At this point the person must know that redeployment is an option. This must be put in writing to allow no wiggle room in understanding.

In conclusion, the greatest challenge you'll face in coaching is not the individual's performance, but your own clarity. Far too few managers know how to articulate the difference between mediocre performance and good performance. And if you can't describe it you can't expect it. You must do the hard work of detailing the behaviors and results you expect to see and contrasting those with typical mediocre performance. Every minute you spend more expertly articulating expectations will save you an hour in debate and resentment later.

All the success,

PM in the AM

The #1 Leadership Problem

http://www.bnet.com/blog/business-strategy/the-1-leadership-problem/1104?promo=713&tag=nl.e713

Building Engagement and Profits in Tough Economic Times

In good times, employee engagement is the difference between being good and being great. In bad times, it’s the difference between surviving or not. In good times and bad, low engagement reduces performance and profit. In good times, consumer demand can disguise the lapses in productivity that disengagement causes. But in bad times, there isn’t any way to hide the performance problems of disengagement.

There are several levers leaders can pull to help employees stay positive and engaged:

• Clarifying expectations.
• Providing information, materials and resources needed to do work right.
• Granting opportunities to do what your crew does best every day.
• Giving frequent recognition and praise for doing good work..
• Caring about your crew as individuals.
• Planning, enabling and encouraging development.
• Asking for opinions from your employees.
• Communicating the company’s vision/mission.

Recognition provides employees with a personal, positive indication that they are valued and are necessary contributors. This can be incredibly powerful when the economic news is unrelentingly negative. Managers shouldn’t reserve recognition only for big wins; they should applaud small victories too. Also, when it comes to recognition individualization matters.

WOW point! Research reveals that proper employee recognition has a significant impact on operating margin. Operating margin shows how much a company makes from each dollar of sales before interest and taxes. In general, businesses with higher operating margins tend to have lower costs and better gross margins. This gives them more pricing flexibility and an added measure of safety during tough economic times. According to the data, companies in the highest quartile of recognition of excellence report had operating margin of 6.6 percent, while those in the lowest quartile report 1 percent.

It helps morale to focus discussions on employees’ strengths. Tom Rath, author of Strengths Based Leadership, recommends spending 80 percent of time talking about your employees’ strengths and 20 percent on things they should improve.

What your company’s vision or purpose? To some, that might seem like a pre-recession question, one that no longer resonates when businesses are focusing on survival. Well it isn’t. In fact, it’s essential in this climate. Mission or purpose is the strategic structure that pulls organizations through the worst of times. While nearly everyone in corporate America is cutting costs and trying to stimulate revenues organizations that have a clear vision won’t be looking for silver bullets or grasping at straws or just cutting costs with no clear focus. Instead, they will have more clarity in their cuts and more certainty on how to stimulate revenues.

·    To run an organization effectively, leaders must set visions and priorities, plan, build relationships, influence others, and make things happen. But if you ask followers what they need from leaders, the clear answer is INTEGRITY, STABILITY, CARING and HOPE.

·    INTEGRITY: trust is primarily built through relationships, and it’s important because it’s the foundational currency that a leader has with his team or his followers. Trust is built by being honest with people about the realities of the business and the realities of their performance.

·    STABILITY: In these rough economic times, leaders can’t entirely quell the fears that people feel. But they can promote a feeling of stability from day to day, and that creates a sense of security and engagement. The leader’s biggest short-term problem can be the distraction and even paralysis that comes from anxiety that employees may feel about their own jobs and the jobs of their friends and family members. Predictability is a good antidote for feelings of insecurity. Try to exude as much of a ‘business as usual’ feel and meet people’s need for stability and security so that while they may be hearing bad economic news and while everything else is changing there are some predictable elements in work and life.

·    CARING: The lifeblood of employee engagement is caring—the feeling that your boss or someone at work cares about you personally, that someone encourages your development, and that the people around you care about the work they do. While caring is always an essential aspect of engagement, when employees, feel (Whether their perceptions are real or not) insecure about their jobs, knowing that someone cares is enormously important—and individualization is implicit in caring. You can’t show people you care if don’t know them, so you have to spend with people one on one.

WOW point! Even in the best times, many leaders may be hesitant to show that they care about their employees. They may think that expressions or demonstrations of caring will undermine professionalism, make difficult decisions harder, or have a negative impact on employees’ performance.

In fact, THAT’S WRONG! Gallup research shows that the more leaders about their individual employees, the higher those workers performance will be. Yet when companies are cutting jobs, hours or raises, retreating from personal connections is a natural self-protective instinct. How can you ask a worker about her kids today when you suspect you’ll be cutting her hours tomorrow? But cutting people off can make them more insecure—and make bad news harder to hear too.

Showing you care can keep engagement alive!

·    HOPE: Hope creates an aspirational factor among all the things you are trying to do in your company, and gives people a reason to commit. Hope suggests that the future will better (if not the past) than the present, and that what we’re doing as a company now will contribute toward creating the future. You can’t build hope without trust. You can’t build hope without security and caring. But trust, security and caring aren’t enough. You do need hope to draw people toward a better future and give them aspirations. And it’s a critical aspect of leadership right now. The challenge today is managing fear, then building hope about goals that we can all believe in.

WOW point! Hope requires initiative but according to the Gallup research, leaders are far more likely to react than to initiate—even though leaders will more often than not say they are proactive and not reactive.