A
mentor of mine has been following a disciplined meditation practice for
more than 5 years. He says it helps him stay calm, clear and focused on
the present moment.
It shows. Although he has a mountain of responsibilities, I’ve never seen him looking stressed out or anxious.
Perhaps he’s onto something.
After all, the present moment is all we have. There was never a time when your life wasn’t not now, nor will there ever be. Your life is and always be “this moment.”
The odd thing about this realization is that it is both bone-crushingly obvious and, at the same time, seldom acknowledged.
Each
day we’re caught up in our own personal dramas. We struggle to meet the
deadline, finish the project, make the appointment, pick up the kids,
drop off the car, stop at the bank, visit the folks, plan the
dinner…driving around, we are swept up in the recollections of the past
or, more likely, endless planning and worrying about the future.
By living in a state of distraction, we deny ourselves the only time we have to be fully present. Right now.
Trust
me, you cannot savor your Asian chicken salad with the water chestnuts
and sliced tangerines (Or a deep-fried pork sandwich and a side of curly fries) if you’re worrying about next week’s budget
meeting. Nor can you enjoy your afternoon by the lake with your grandson
if you’re talking on your device or fuming about something you saw on
a news feed.
You
can only appreciate the good things in your life when you’re fully
present. Doing this allows you to minimize your negatives, too.
All
of us face situations that are depressing, frustrating, or maddening.
Yet, more often than not, our anxieties are the result of our own faulty
thinking. It may be tough to admit, but it is our mindset—rather than
the situation itself—that creates the negative emotions.
As
Shakespeare wrote, “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking
make it so.” Truly, it is our thoughts that torment us, not our
problems.
Some
may disagree. After all if you have a child with a serious drug
addiction or a parent that is dying of cancer, the problem isn’t in your
mind. It’s real.
But
there are only two kinds of bad situations in the world: those that can
be solved and those that can’t. If you have a situation that can be
solved, get busy fixing it. If you have one that can’t, get busy
accepting it.
After
all, your thoughts determine your happiness. The good news is that you
can control them. That’s the power behind Reinhold Niebuhr’s well-known
Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can; and Wisdom to know the difference.
Incidentally,
while Niebuhr wrote this prayer roughly 85 years ago, there is an Irish
rhyme dating back to 1695 that expresses a remarkably similar
sentiment:
For every ailment under the sun,
There is a remedy, or there is none:
If there be one, try to find it;
If there be none, never mind it.
But
when something truly sad or tragic happens, how do you keep from
minding it? There is no easy answer to this one. Some wounds only time
can heal. But returning to the present moment can help.
As Eckhart Tolle wrote in The Power of Now,
“Narrow your life down to this moment. Your life situation may be full
of problems—most life situations are—but find out if you have any
problem at this moment. Not tomorrow or in ten minutes, but now. Do you
have a problem now?”
Tolle
says it’s impossible to feel troubled when your attention is full in
the Now. You have situations that need to be dealt with or accepted—yes.
But only worries about the future or regrets about the past can turn
into personal quagmires.
Skeptics
may argue that altering your thinking doesn’t change the problem, just
your perception of it. But that’s the magic of it. Higher awareness is
often that prelude to a solution.
Tolle
says, “Accept—then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept is
as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, no against it. Make it
your friend and ally, not your enemy. This will miraculously transform
your whole life.”
How
do you get started? Ironically, by becoming conscious of your lack of
consciousness—something the majority of us never do—you take the first
step toward an elevated state of mind. Your ability to enjoy your life,
and deal successfully with your problems, increases the moment you
become fully present.
Beware
though. Living in the present moment means abandoning your old ways of
thinking. In the present moment there is no judging, cherishing your
opinions, or nurturing discontent.
It means slowing down. Relaxing. Focusing on your breath. Listening to the breeze. Or just taking a good look around.
You have the opportunity to enhance your life simply by choosing where to direct your attention. Where should that be?
Right here. Right now.
“The past is history, the future’s a mystery, today’s a gift, that’s why it’s called the present.”
Check these related posts:
To your greater success and equanimity.
Peter Mclees, Leadership Coach, Trainer and Performance Consultant
SMART DEVELOPMENT
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